You Know You are Paleo When…

paleo imageI don’t know many people…well any personally that are 100% Paleo all the time. That blows my mind and I am not sure how that really works out in everyday life. I truly aspire to be 100% Paleo 90-95% of the time. There are days when you just can’t plan for every scenario! NOT POSSIBLE! I am not a mind reader and neither are you, unless you are like this lady….remember the infomercials for her back in the day?? No?? Just me?

You have a constant aroma of bacon in your home
You get weird looks when you turn down “heathy” non-paleo food options
The produce and meat guys at the grocery store know you very well
You wish your refrigerator had more vegetable (crisp) compartments
Your burgers are ordered bunless and with extra bacon
You avoid wheat like the black plague
You eat one thing that is not paleo and everyone starts asking you if it is your cheat day..…come on! Sometimes a girl just wants a piece of cheese!
Having “a lot of sugar” could be a simple as a banana..not always, but sometimes
People constantly ask you if you are on a diet—it is a lifestyle!
When people ask you if something is healthy to tell them to start reading you the ingredients
People tell you “But bread is in the Bible, so it has to be good for you” —(There are a lot of things in the Bible that would be considered not good for you!)
You have a coconut or avocado addiction…or both!
People ask you to clarify your dietary restrictions before they have you over for dinner (seriously that is very nice and all but I feel like not being rude should take precedence over my dietary choices..)
You always have nuts, larabars, beef jerky and/or stevia with you
A piece of dark chocolate is a splurge
When you think that “nasty” foods are delicious…like brussel sprouts….they have such a bad reputation, but they are awesome!
When you have been told “I just can’t eat this, it is too healthy.”
You talk a lot about inflammation
People try to convince you to eat a cookie by saying “if there were cookies back in the “Paleo” time period, I am sure the cavemen would have eaten it.”
You hunt and gather your own food (that is hardcore right there..and so not me)
You choose your coffee place by their non-dairy milk selection
You have days where all you can think about is ice cream (coconut of course)…or that could just be me??–maybe not just a paleo problem
People ask you “is wine paleo?” “what about beer?” –Whiskey is where it is at and no it is not paleo!
Your kids ask for coconut water and other healthy snacks options over french fries and soda
You talk about how grains are evil
People always want to give you their opinion on why your diet is unhealthy
You can argue coffee being paleo
Your very memorable detox did not require hospitalization
People look at you baffled and say “You ate how much today?”
You’ve considered raising your own chickens and cows or use a grass-fed beef distributer
You have found any way possible to make “paleo” desserts and totally justify eating more than you should because it’s paleo.

I literally searched for a good paleo joke or comic strip for an hour, but no such luck! If you have one, please share!


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